She Knows You’re Cheating & The 10 Signs That Give You Away
He’s acting … differently, but you just can’t put your finger on why. Then, his cell phone rings in the middle of the night and he doesn’t have a good explanation.
Is he cheating or is he just going through a rough time?
We’ve all heard the “he blames you for cheating” and “his cell phone has a password on it” behaviors of cheating men, but those are the obvious shifts.
Here are the top 10 tell-tale signs a woman watches for in her man.
1. He strays from his predictable everyday behavior.
A woman knows you’re cheating before there is any real evidence. She can just tell.
After spending time with someone for a number of months (or even years), you know their typical behavior. You know how they act in certain situations and when they act differently, you want an explanation—if not cheating, then something else real and tangible.
2. He has unpredictable mood swings.
If he’s constantly looking for reasons to get away, and it’s hard to think of new excuses all the time, he’ll start a fight with you.
Being angry in an instant—or being overly nice—is a red flag. There’s no real reason for him to leave, so he has to create one.
New activities that he goes to all the time (but never mentions afterward) is a glaring example. If he was going somewhere and had no reason to hide it, he would most likely talk about it with you.
“I just need time alone.”—while logical, excuses like these are usually without a reason or completely out of the norm for him.
3. He has a rapid change in weight or appearance.
Cheating men change physically. Their love handles disappear, their posture changes and their muscle tone/definition returns. It’s the body’s primal means of preparing for courtship—he’s readying himself to attract a mate.
In addition, cheating men start taking much better care of themselves and take a lot of pride in their appearance. He’s suddenly pressing his clothes, coiffing his hair and shaving daily when he didn’t before … especially when leaving the house without you.
4. He has an overnight change in musical taste.
There’s nothing wrong with trying new things. But when it’s out of the blue and he excludes you from the change, it’s a warning sign that something is amiss.
5. He remembers things wrong or loses track of the details.
As he spends more time with both you and his mistress, the memories of his time spent with her and the memories of his time spent with you will start to blur together. Schedules get crossed and he won’t be able to keep track of where he was on any given day. The time he spent with another woman is entirely unaccounted for—often, with no explanation.
6. He suddenly needs a lot of privacy.
To take time for one’s self is normal. But when it’s out of the normal pattern—or is more and more frequent—it’s a sign that something else is going in. Going into work early, leaving late, getting off the phone suddenly, taking lots of private calls from a “relative” (mom, sister, someone untrackable) are also red flags.
7. He has a drastic change in sexual appetite and style.
He’ll start up an affair and all he’ll want is sex, but not from you. You’ll know something is up, especially if your sex life was always pretty active.”
He’ll also start sleeping with you much more often. He’ll be either really aggressive or passionate in bed. In a way you haven’t seen him before.
You find condoms when you clearly do not use them. (What more do you need after this one.)
A sudden shift in what’s “regular” or familiar in bed—without discussing wanting something new—is a big warning sign of cheating. He’ll be experiencing a huge rush of testosterone, which manifest as a new confidence during sex.
He’ll feel strong, masculine, virile … like every woman wants him. His ego will grow daily.
8. He hides his financial history from you.
Most cheating men will need an untraceable way to pay for things: gifts, meals, hotels, trips, etc. Reloadable credit cards, PayPal accounts, eBay purchases are all great ways to hide large or frequent transactions. Definitely investigate large, random transfers or cash withdrawals.
9. He has new “friends” at work and/or more work responsibilities.
Office & work affairs are very common, especially considering how much time is spent working together.
He might mention his new “friend” to dispel any suspicions you have and if you pop in to the office unexpectedly, he might even introduce you to his “coworker” to throw you off the scent.
Follow your gut and pay attention to his other behaviors.
10. He’s secretive with his technology.
iMessages on the iPhone are untraceable on cell phone bills.
SnapChat on cellphones are used to communicate.
Established new Gmail accounts communicating within the drafts folder, without ever sending anything.
Using Glyph to send anonymous, ‘cloaked’ emails.
Technology is now smarter and affairs have gone high-tech.
A new password on his cellphone or computer, a change of password at your bank or cellphone company or cellphones being “left in the car” were once valid signs of infidelity.
But now, cheaters fly under the radar by using technology to do their communication dirty work. Apps exist that allow text messages, online chat sessions and pictures to last for a certain amount of time (and then disappear). Pay attention to new email accounts and new apps being used on his cell phone.
While these signs aren’t foolproof signs of cheating, a few taken in combination are sure signs that something is up.
Don’t make accusations that you can’t back up. But, if you do suspect it, sit him down for a long talk about your concerns. If that nagging feeling doesn’t disappear, you have some choices to make (Leave or stay)—and perhaps some investigations to start.